


Starlight

by thirdgymnasium



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: And Suga, Canon Compliant, Couch Cuddles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, References to David Bowie, Spoilers, and stars, nerds, oikawa just loves outer space, pretty setters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:07:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26991139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thirdgymnasium/pseuds/thirdgymnasium
Summary: Just boyfriends reassuring each other in their own particular ways.
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	Starlight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [roccoco](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roccoco/gifts).



> Songs referenced:
> 
> Moonage Daydream, David Bowie  
> The Prettiest Star, David Bowie  
> Starlight, Electric Light Orchestra
> 
> i highly suggest you listen to them while reading, they're already beautiful songs on their own
> 
> se lo dedico a lu porque me hizo pensar en oikawa escuchando a bowie <3

The Nationals were two weeks away and Suga had been noticing how Oikawa’s exhaustion kept building up while his own vanished, even though it was Karasuno the team that was going to Tokyo that time, and not Aoba Joshai. His feelings had been a muddle since the qualifying matches, being both third years. They clicked instantly after their first practice match of the year and, by the time they got together, they already knew this moment would be painful to get through no matter the outcome.

Suga was still staggered, seeing the opportunity to play one last time with his best friends as both a thrill and an honour. Being often off court, he had seen them grow from his very intimate perspective and he thought that made him Karasuno’s number one fan. Oikawa was probably even more proud than Suga himself. He admired the way his boyfriend committed himself to the team, giving in all his efforts. When he was in the warming up area, he analysed the game, checked on his teammates and led the cheers, all at the same time, and with the same energy during the whole match. And when he was on the court… the mood shifted completely. He kept doing the same jobs as off court, but a sense of responsibility weighed on him. Calmly, he was able to push everyone to their limits, including himself, appreciating every play he took a part in or allowed to happen. Oikawa was mesmerised by watching him. At first he seemed cautious and predictable, especially compared to Kageyama, but he soon understood Suga was no easy opponent. Sometimes, he was even more ambitious than the first year setter himself, known for his extravagant talent. That doesn’t even start to cover the reasons why Oikawa thought Suga was more than deserving of his victory.

Still, he was more frustrated than ever. Not because of the game, or his teammates from Aoba Johsai or even Karasuno. He was frustrated with himself. No matter how hard he tried, he was always close, but it was never enough. And he was convinced it was his fault. He had a formidable team with a very wide set of abilities that he was unable to exploit at its fullest. He couldn’t deal with the fact that he gave more than his hundred percent and he still didn’t measure up to the challenge.

That Friday, when Oikawa came back home, Suga had been there for a while. His boyfriend’s parents weren’t home and he had opened the door with the spare key he had. He was already showered, wearing an Aoba Johsai jersey, he had prepared a simple dinner for both of them to enjoy while they watched _Guardians of the Galaxy_ , like they had planned some days earlier, and he was now trying to finish his mandatory course reading of the semester. They didn’t see each other during the whole week and they were both looking forward to that night. As much as Suga loved his teammates and responsibly fulfilled the expectations of training for the Nationals, he always found himself seeking comfort in his boyfriend's arms, in their own privacy, treasuring the precious time they spent together after their respective practice schedules. Meanwhile, Oikawa had been staying later each day in the school gym, often retaining his teammates with him, trying to perfect their combinations and maximise their success rates, even if they were never playing a tournament together again. Even Iwaizumi, who had been keeping Suga updated on Oikawa’s state, couldn’t keep up with him.

Suga was re-reading the same paragraph for the fifth time, finding himself lost in his own thoughts, unable to concentrate, when his boyfriend opened the door. He was still wearing his volleyball jersey, knee pads down in his calves, his hair was messy and the bags under his eyes looked heavier than usual. He managed to walk in elegantly, taking his shoes off in his habitual flamboyant way and chanting “I’m here Kou-chan!”; his attitude heavily contrasting with his negligent physical state. Seeing him in that condition made Suga want to cry, run to him and hold him until he understood that his worth was determined by much more than the outcome of a match, and that the weaknesses he saw in himself were a mere illusion of his harsh self criticism. Taking a mental note to approach that subject later in the most tender way possible, he decided to toss his book aside and get up to hug him from the back, wrapping his arms around his waist, standing on the tip of his toes so he could place a handful of soft kisses on his neck, ignoring the feel of sweat dried up from the cold. Oikawa turned around to catch his lips for a second, slightly pulling his face back to kiss his forehead right after. 

“I missed you” he mumbled, lips still pressed to his temple. Fatigue could be read all over his voice.

“It’s been a long week,” Suga replied, tightening the grip around his boyfriend.

They stayed in that position for a while, till their hearts were beating at the same pace, and headed for the couch. They ate and watched the movie in silence, and Suga eventually placed himself in his boyfriend’s lap, when they were both done with their food. Half an hour into it, he could already feel how absent Oikawa was, even if this was one of their favourite movies, being equally nerdy and chaotic. His chest wasn’t rocking up and down with drowned laughters as it usually did, and when Suga turned around he saw the film's vibrant colours reflected on his glasses, but he didn’t find the same in his eyes.

“Oikawa” he called for him, barely receiving a blink in response. “Tooru” he tried again, softer this time, bringing a hand to his face.That brought him back to reality, and seconds later brought tears to his eyes. Oikawa realised it had been a long time since the last time he cried, almost a year probably, and he buried his face in his boyfriend’s shoulder, embarrassed. Suga reached carefully for the remote to turn down the television volume and started stroking his hair with his free hand. 

“Let’s go freshen up your face” he said simply when Oikawa calmed down, guiding him to the bathroom and gently washing away the tears. 

Oikawa looked straight into his boyfriend’s gray eyes and he couldn't be more thankful for having him by his side. He didn’t know how to tell him though, given he barely understood the way he felt about him. He cherished their playful moments, their smiles and their embraces. He adored listening to him ramble about literature, history and philosophy. He enjoyed their nightwalks more than anything, holding hands under the stars. He was thankful for his hands, smaller than his but stronger at the same time, that grounded him when his mind wanted to fly away. Oikawa had always been so good with words, why did they slip away from him when it came to Kou-chan?

Suddenly, he felt like crying again, happy tears threatening to invade his eyes this time, but he swallowed it up. He grabbed Suga’s hands instead, and pressed his lips against each of them. Afterwards, he turned around in a rather brusque movement, very unlike him, and headed for the stairs. “I’m gonna study” he announced as he walked off, dragging his feet heavily.

Suga was waiting for an alarming sign like this one to finally get into a much needed conversation, so he grabbed Oikawa’s wrist and walked him back to the couch, meeting no resistance whatsoever. 

“No you’re not” he said, with a pinch of firmness in his tone, when they were both sitting face to face, legs crossed, knees touching the others’. “It’s Friday, and the exams period is over for everyone. What you need to do right now is talk to me.”

“What did I do wrong?” he asked in a shaky voice, after weighing his words for a long minute, not sure what to say. Suga knew this moment would come eventually and had prepared for it, knowing exactly what he wanted Oikawa to hear and delivering it in the most earnest way possible.

“Absolutely nothing” he started, slowly. “Did you know you’re always exceeding everyone's expectations? Including mine. It’s inspiring to see how hard you work, as a teammate, as a rival and as your boyfriend too. What I don't like is seeing you overworking yourself to the point where you put your health at risk.” Suga’s tone hinted concern now. “Last time it was your knee. Now you’re practically consuming yourself. Last match’s result, no matter its consequences for your team’s future, does not determine your value as a player or less as a person.” Oikawa opened his mouth, probaby to reply that it was easy for him to say that because he was on the winning side this time, but Suga knew him a little bit too well already and, anticipating it, he quickly placed a hand on his boyfriend's thigh, making him look down, and resumed his speech. “I know it seems like you’ll never get the rewards you deserve for your efforts, but I know you will, cause you’re the most dedicated player I know. It may sound too optimistic to your disenchanted ears right now, but please trust me. You will. Please don’t give up on volleyball until you’ve gotten there. Just, take care of yourself as well.” 

A silence full of love and respect surrounded them, and Oikawa was now thinking how he wanted to make it to the top just to share that success with Suga, finding a new purpose than his own pride, which had made him become the player he was, but also drove him off track sometimes. How could he be seeing it just now? He would never disappoint him, because that simply wasn’t possible with Suga.

“I admire you enormously, and always will,” he confirmed Oikawa’s thoughts. It always seemed like he was reading his mind. “Not because of your victories, but because of your passion. And I’m not only talking about volleyball. I’m talking about the way you devote yourself to others, and about the spark in your eyes when we talk about… anything. I’m really lucky to have you by my side, Tooru.” 

Seeing his boyfriend was, again, at loss of words, he spoke one last time: “Don’t worry, you don’t have to say anything. I’m here for you now, like I know you would and will be for me.” Oikawa wanted to tell him that he would be by his side through everything from now on, and so he did with a tender kiss. _Moonage Daydream_ played shortly in the movie as their lips danced together, and Oikawa couldn't help himself from discretely humming it. He loved David Bowie, who often sang about space and aliens and the stars. He loved the stars too. Suga had figured this out way long before Tooru dedicated him _The Prettiest Star_ , by the same artist. He wasn’t good with voicing his feelings, but he sure was a sap in his own way. 

“ _Keep your ‘lectric eye on me babe_ ” Oikawa sang now, looking into the other’s grey eyes, only centimeters away from his. Delighted by his boyfriend’s voice, Suga pulled his face back just enough.

“I love you Tooru” he declared, to which Oikawa responded “I love you too Kou-chan” in the same heartfelt way. 

“Let’s go to the park and play some volleyball tomorrow,” Suga said. “Just some chill tosses and passes, we can get lunch in that salad place you like too.” His suggestion was met with excitement. He had, once again, figured out exactly what his boyfriend needed. 

They cuddled on the couch until the movie was over and they cuddled in Oikawa’s bed later too. And when Oikawa couldn’t sleep, and he pulled his laptop to watch volleyball matches in the middle of the night, thinking he was the only one awake, Suga would place his head on his lap, so he would stroke his hair instead.

Some weeks later, Oikawa held a devastated Suga who had just came back from Tokyo, kissing through his tears and playing Electric Light Orchestra for him. 

“ _I can feel you're so real, I can see you're so near_ ” he sang sweetly in his ear.

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading! this was not my first work but i haven't written anyhing in a while and it's my first experience with ao3, so it ight be a bit sloppy. i hope you enjoyed it, please leave you kudos and comments if u did :) 
> 
> i might come back with something else, who knows


End file.
